ARROW SCHOOL FOR MEN

It is not hard to figure out where a boy has recently been. The trail that a boy leaves in his wake is most assuredly one of havoc and mess. A boy leaves the cereal box and the milk (with the cap off) on the counter while he is out playing tag or riding bikes with his friends. Seldom does a boy’s dirty clothes actually make it into the laundry basket. I know that when I was a boy my brothers and I broke my Mom’s window with a baseball, knocked over shelves, ran through the house with muddy shoes, and almost never put a single thing away! Boys are impulsive, make and break promises on the same day, and leave a trail of carnage as they grow up. And while parents do not enjoy all these aspects of boyhood we know that to force them to be too clean, too orderly, and too refined might emasculate them and crush their spirits. Boys thrive on bouncing from one thing to another and catapulting their bodies (and anything not attached to the ground) into the air and at one another.

Naturally, most men grasp the concept that one of their roles as a man is to "Provide and Protect" in the physical realm. However, the physical aspect of being a human is sometimes easily dismissed. The truth is that we were created by God as physical beings and because of sin we need to physically provide and protect our families.

“Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me,” is the biggest load of you know what. God through His word created the heavens and the earth and our words and actions as men have the power to build or destroy ourselves and those around us. The words we speak and the words we believe about ourselves are tied very closely to the condition of our emotions. Countless men let their emotions control them, but God has given us a spirit of self-control (2 Timothy 1:7) such that we do not have to be slaves to sin.

At lunch the other day I sat down with my family and specifically asked my wife, “What does it look like for a man to provide and protect spiritually?” She immediately responded with, "A man initiates". In her wisdom and experience a man takes the lead, starts out, and takes the risk in all areas but most importantly in all spiritual matters. A boy waits for his Dad or in most cases, his Mom to tell him what to do. In stark contrast a man leads his family in devotions, praise, prayer, attending church especially when they are resistant. But then the question arises how do I become a man who initiates? And how do I get my family to follow me?

Which of these pictures captures manhood? We are automatically drawn to the picture on the right but are you sure? When I was a kid I thought that you became a man when you grew older. My Dad was a man so I naturally thought that when I was his age I would automatically become a man. Then in high school and college I noticed there were boys that were 16-22 years of age and I casually dismissed this that they were late to mature. But then in my 20s and 30s I realized there were “boys” in my life that were 15, 25, 35, 55, and 75 years old. These “boys” were irresponsible, selfish, arrogant, unteachable, slanderers, unfaithful, inconsistent and lazy. This realization warred with my previous conception that when you grew older you became a man. And in fact I began to realize that I knew some men who were 14 and 16 years of age. This then begged the question, when or how do you become a man?